Future Parents!!

 

 

Letter is from Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft Subject: Problems with my new computer  Dear Mr. Bill Gates, We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems,  which I want to bring to your notice. 1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.                                                   2. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friends clicked 'run'   he ran up to Amritsar ! So, we request you to change that to 'sit', so that we can click that by sitting.                                                                     3. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find    only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home. 4.. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this ' find' button,  but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem. 5. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that? 6. I brought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'MY Computer': when you will provide the remaining items? 7. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not   even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that. 8. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.                                                                     9. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?                                                                     10. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God shake please do not provide   'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my  office hours.                                                                 Regards,                                                                     Banta                                                               Last one from me to Mr Bill Gates : Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but u are selling WINDOWS?       .

The Moment Of His Life!!

You won't see this photo on CNN. Everyone is too busy showing the Queen receiving the VIP guests at Buckingham Palace. This was a "touching" Kodak moment outside 10 Downing Street that won't be forgotten by this cop. This is the most powerful photo in the series. Remember they are not supposed to shake hands, but the two brothers couldn't resist the historic moment. The black royal cop never imagined in his wildest dream that he would usher a black American president into the British corridors of power. Nice !!!!

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software engineer and his wife ( See Log File )

 

software engineer and his wife     Husband - hey dear, I am logged in. Wife - would you like to have some snacks? Husband - hard disk full. Wife - have you brought the saree. Husband - Bad command or file name. Wife - but I told you about it in morning Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel. Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary. Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time. Wife - at least give me your credit card, i can do some shopping. Husband - sharing violation, access denied. Wife - i made a mistake in marrying you. Husband - data type mismatch. Wife - you are useless. Husband - by default. Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning? Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot. Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist? Husband - the only user with write permission. Wife - what is my value in your life? Husband - unknown virus detected. Wife - do you love me or your computer? Husband - Too many parameters.. Wife - i will go to my dad's house. Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close. Wife - I will leave you forever. Husband - close all programs and log out for another User. Wife - it is worthless talking to you. Husband - shut down the computer. Wife - I am going Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer            ************ *     __,_._,___

Women

 

 

A father came home and found his three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.
The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog.
Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall.
In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.
In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor,a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor.
Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel.

She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?"

"Yes," was his incredulous reply.

She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."

Send this page to a woman. Its Priceless!!!!!!!!
And a man so that he understands the value of a woman :)...

 

 

 

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